In a moment that feels less like governance and more like a deleted scene from Idiocracy: The Prequel, President Trump—yes, again—has decided that the Department of Defense just isn’t aggressive enough. So now it’s the Department of War. DOW. Because apparently the vibes weren’t fascist-adjacent enough.
It’s the bureaucratic equivalent of spray-painting “WE’RE THE BAD GUYS” on the Pentagon and calling it patriotism.
Let’s be clear: Congress didn’t rename anything. The legal name stays the same. But all the public-facing language—the signage, the speeches, the ceremony—is now full “Department of War.” The Secretary of Defense is now the Secretary of War, because Trump thinks the word “defense” is for wimps and nuance is a communist plot.
This isn’t a policy change. It’s a symbolic escalation.
It’s a marketing decision dressed up as manifest destiny. And it’s loud.
The Tao, the DOW, and the War for Meaning
Here’s where it gets weird—in a cult-philosophy, word-matters, metaphysical-rumble kind of way.
DOW and TAO? Same pronunciation. Same mouth-sounds. Completely opposite realities.
The Tao is about flow. Non-resistance. Knowing when not to act. It’s rivers, bamboo, uncarved blocks, and actual wisdom.
The DOW is about brute force rebranding. It’s strapping testosterone to a bureaucratic filing cabinet and screaming, “LOOK HOW STRONG I AM.”
Same phonetics. One means alignment with nature. The other means military cosplay with better graphics.
You cannot make this up. But we live here now.
Why Language Still Matters (Even When Everything’s On Fire)
This isn’t just about words. It’s about intention. This is what authoritarianism does when it’s not quite ready to pull the trigger—it changes the language first. Because once you get people saying “war” instead of “defense,” you don’t have to justify the aggression. You’ve normalized it.
Call it what it is: narrative laundering.
Rebranding violence as inevitability.
Turning the Tao into the DOW and hoping nobody notices the irony because they’re too tired, too scared, or too distracted by whatever fresh horror the algorithm is serving today.
But we notice. We always notice.
So What Now?
We do what we’ve always done.
We pay attention.
We write it down.
We make jokes that bite.
We keep community sacred.
And we do not let fascist theater go unreviewed.
We don’t need more outrage. We need clarity. Satire sharp enough to cut through the fog. Psychology that doesn’t flinch. Language that refuses to be recruited.
So welcome to the DOW.
The Tao’s belligerent cousin who shows up to Thanksgiving in full tactical gear and demands you say grace to the flag.
He doesn’t understand flow.
He understands force.
He doesn’t know how to listen.
He only knows how to brand.
And we?
We document the collapse with dark humor and filing cabinets full of inconvenient truth.
Pass the clipboard.
We’ve got work to do.
